Adjusting Boobies: One crack at a time.

My body! It is failing me! Promise me you won't think I am a crazy hypochondriac when I tell you this- It is that weird.

Two weeks ago I woke up with a weird crick on the left side of my neck. Those suck, yes? We've all had them but usually by the next morning you feel fine and forgot it ever hurt. Not this time. After this crick had been present for two days I noticed a new soreness down around my shoulder blade. It was getting worse and now I had two sore spots, yay! About 5 days ago, I noticed the skin on my left arm was sore to the touch. A very strange kind of sore, like a localized body ache. Then I noticed It was very uncomfortable to brush my hair, only on the left side of my head. All this happening on the left side of my body. It has become unbearable. If I want to go for a walk, I need to plan accordingly and take 2 Advil 2 hours before, otherwise it is all too painful.

I've decided it is time for me to visit a Chiropractor. I am a little nervous. This person is going to be cracking and popping my spine and neck. I've gone before. I was a freshman in high school and had an important track meet coming up. A few days before, I was in gym class and we were in the gymnastics unit. The overgrown Mary Lou Retton in me decided to bounce into a dive roll. I'm not sure I bounced though. I think it was more of a splat then a crunch and my neck was totally effed. My parents took me to a Chiropractor that went to our church. I think he helped my neck, I don't really remember. What I do remember is how strange I thought it was that he felt my boobs. Now maybe I was over-analyzing but still I told my parents. My dad came with me on my next visit and what do you know, no boob adjustment. Just strange and inappropriate. Thankfully is wasn't young enough to feel traumatized by the quack.

I start Friday. I want to feel good again. I want to start running. I want to not hurt. Dude just better stay away from my boobies.

Show your slings!

Steph over at Adventures in Babywearing is having another little cyber-party. This time she's asking others to show their slings. I have 6 but one that blows all the others away.

My Babyhawk.


Oh, how I love her. She's so pretty. Mine is two sided one side with skulls, the other with hula girls, all with cherry trim. She is very well-made and sturdy. And the coolest part that I never anticipated was that my husband loved her almost as much as I did. Had I known, I would've picked one side to be a little more masculine. But he rocked her anyway!

After 3 years...

who knew I had it in me? I did this new design all by myself! How 'bout them apples?

Essence of Another Man.

Are you watching Dancing with the Stars? I'm not, but last night as I was tying my running shoes to take the dog for a walk, the TV happened to be on that channel.

Oh Sweet Jesus. Can we just have a moment of silence for the perfection of Jason Taylor? He makes me salivate. I don't care what kind of men make you swoon; If he doesn't, I may have to check and make sure you have a beating heart. That man is all sorts of beautiful.

Now. Can I tell you how I once had his sweat on my body?

Why don't you go get a big icy glass of water or lemonade. This may take a while and I wouldn't want you to overheat. *wink, wink*

You may of may not know that about 5 years ago Pedro and I were living in Florida. We lived in Fort Lauderdale the next city over was Davie-where JT resides. We only lived there for a year but we had a lot of fun in that short time. While we were there we both belonged to a big name gym. I did a typical chick workout of either aerobics or the elliptical and on a really ambitious day maybe some light weights. Pedro would usually lift weights and then play basketball on one of the courts. A few times Pedro played with Jason Taylor. For the record, Pedro is 6-6 and what do you know? Jason Taylor is 6-6. They played against each other. You know what that means...all kinds of bumping and grinding in the most masculine way, of course. My husband and Jason Taylor.

So that night as we drove home from the gym, I am pretty sure I tried to rub all the leftover sweat off of Pedro thinking that there just might be a drop of JT mixed in.* Then I asked him if JT smelled good. He didn't answer. He only gave me a look that said I was completely out of my mind.**

Jason can do that to a girl.




*only slight exaggeration!

**honest to God truth!

A Picnic Is No Picnic.

I couldn't handle looking at that last post anymore, so today we had a picnic. We planned it just right so Pedro could join us for lunch. Sheesh! You almost forget how much work it is to prepare. A Ton! From the time I woke up this morning I went to work prepping for the afternoon.

I baked bread, my new obsession.

I made my favorite salad.

I made sandwiches, ran to the grocery store to get drinks and dessert,and we were off just three and a half hours later!

We got to the park and Mason was already starving. He'd play for a few minutes and then run back to grab a bite.

Pedro drove in a few minutes later. He ran around with the kids to keep warm since it was freezing.

We ate, played


played some more.

And then we were all headed out. Pedro back to work and us back home for naps.


It was all good fun, but next time? I am totally going to Subway.

*if you'd like to see more picnic photos you can see them all here.

Mother's Day.

I wish I could say my mother's day was a happy one, and there were happy moments, but the day weighed heavy on me. I wish I could write that my mom and I spent the day together having lunch and manicures, talking and laughing until we cried. The truth is that I didn't even see her. The lady she's been lately is not the mom I know. The lady today is cursed with addiction so thick she can't see her way out. She forgets, she glares and rarely calls. She is not the mom I had growing up. The mom I had growing up was loving and energetic and wouldn't miss any activity I was in for the world. She was always there.

Today, as much as I wished is was like it was before addiction, it's not. It is so different I can't even begin to explain. Thankfully though I have memories. And the memories I have are great. Nearly perfect. I remember tiny little things that were so special. I remember taking afternoon naps on my parents bed. I remember my mom laying with me jiggling her foot just enough to rock the bed and lull me to sleep. I remember the notes in my lunch box and the Mickey Mouse pancakes. The tiniest things that left an incredible mark.

I look at my kids that I love more than anything and wonder and worry about the marks I'll leave with them. I do things I hope they never remember and also things hopefully never forget. But mostly, I hope they know that I'll always be there for them. Tonight after a long, emotional day I nursed Harper to sleep and tucked Mason in one last time. I told him how much I loved him and how I hoped we had a better day tomorrow, all while his little boy hand sweetly rubbed my cheek; a perfect end to the day.

As much as I wish my day could have been filled with all things bright and cheery. It wasn't . It was however a perfect recap of what being a mama is all about. There was dancing and crying and pouting and smiling. Nursing and rocking and snuggling and soothing. And at the end of the day, I wouldn't change it for the world. Taking the bad with the good; It's what being a Mama is all about.