Thursday, April 24, 2008

Love Thy Neighbor. *EDITED*

I've tried, and I just can't. My neighbor who moved into "button" I've decided is one of those people who puts other people down to make herself feel better. I've let the rude and sometimes just plain mean comments slide but I fear the bite I have on my tongue is about to release. You think I am exaggerating?

Listen to this.

Harper and I were at her house one night and Harper closed her TV armoire. She told Harper to open it back up and as I got up to do it myself, I commented that Harper only followed directions occasionally and that I wasn't even sure she had the concept of open/close.

Her reply: You stay home with her. That is your "job" to teach her that stuff.

Me: She just turned one, she's fine.

Her: My son had a favorite color and could say pur-ple at 9 months.

Clearly she is a better mother.

Then there is this.

We grill-out often. This one night we were grilling a pork tenderloin. She was commenting that it smelled good and I told her we cooked them pretty often since the kids loved them and they were healthy.

Her: Healthy? Pork is like the worst thing you can eat. No one who is really health-conscious eats pork.

Geez. Why did I go the school again when I could just learn everything about health from my totally uneducated neighbor.

On another occasion she preached to Pedro about how we "eat meat in all its murderous forms". Uh, abrasive maybe?

Today she was talking down to me and I finally just looked the other way and said something to my kids. I was ready to literally say, "It must be hard to be so perfect." But I didn't because I don't want to be a bitch.

Seriously how can you treat people like that and still feel good about yourself?

So I need some help. How can I let her know that she is totally offending me? Apparently she is not catching onto my body language. I need it to stop before I unleash and it's not going to be pretty. But Mama can only take so much.

**edited to add- I feel like you won't get the true beauty of "her" if I failed to mention this one...

Her: Pedro leaves at really strange times at night.

Me: He goes to the gym some weeknights after the kids go to bed.

Her: Are you sure he's not cheating...I'm just saying.

OH YES SHE DID. Now can I tell her to eff off?

23 comments:

MP said...

WOW..NOT hanging out with her isn't an option??
I try to just NOT hang around negative people. You only live once...why waste time with people like that?

AnnieM said...

She lives right. next. door.

BethanyWD said...

Unbelievable. I would ignore her like the plague. So sorry for you!

Rachel (Crazy-Is) said...

Unfortunately I have never been good with letting people know that they are pissing me off without being mean. I don't know what to tell you.

Pedro said...

I can honestly say that she is the worst person I have ever met in my life...and easily the most self-centered and egotistical on top of that.

She's nice to my face, and then talks a ton of s**t about me as soon as I walk away. Did I mention that she's talking trash about me to my wife? Is it too much to ask, just to have her talk trash to my face?

Staaaayyyyyyy classy b*****y, single, unemployed, egotistical, free-loading stay at home "mom"!

Lost A Sock said...

Ugh. I have a friend like this. She has redeeming qualities, which is why I have yet to tell her to go fly a kite, but I sooo know what you mean. Good luck.

Jennilu said...

Why don't you casually mention that you have a Blog and tell her she needs to read it. Then give her the url. Enough said

Christy J said...

I would say something like "I didn't know how to bring this up, so I hope you don't take it the WRONG way. You say things, and I'm thinking I don't quite catch your humor. I get really offended by the way you say things to me, and I know you wouldn't intentionally mean to upset me."
Then find some tactful way to say you are a BITCH! :o)

Kelly said...

OMG. What a bitch! I wouldn't hang out with her, even if she does live right next door.

MP said...

Doesn't matter if she is next door...get that c*nt out of your lives...she is clearly jealous of you and more than likely wants your husband...psycho...
I haven't talked to my next door neighbor in months...just start being rude to her and if she still doesn't take the hint tell her...

Isabel said...

It's official...you can't ever talk to her again.

Or you need to move.

Pedro said...

I have to admit, I felt good dropping a $600 surprise heating bill on her the other day after she was bragging to me about all of the crap her sugar daddy just bought her.

Ms. Mamma said...

Wow. I like what Christy J had to say, but I wouldn't add the part "I know you you wouldn't intentionally..." Becasueu maybe she does. I think all you can do is be an 'adult' and get to the point with her. It's so much easier to call her a bitch and ignore her, but at this point, you can't. I wouldn't want her to trash button and leave you holding the bag. The girl doesn't have a pot to piss in or a window to throw it out of. I know I'm not much help, but war is hell. XO

IndyWilsons said...

Oh no she didn't! The implication that Pedro is cheating would be the last straw. Now she's a pot-stirrer too. I would just wean yourself away from her, more and more being busy with your own things. It just stinks because it's finally getting nice there so you'll both want to be outside. Ugh.

Unknown said...

OH MY GOSH!!! I'd like to say to be the better person and just let things be, but man...I'd really want to slap her!!!

Okay, in all seriousness, I'd avoid unnecessary contact with her. It's obvious that she doesn't have anything positive to say and that kind of negative energy is just not worth your time or energy.

But if you really feel the need to express how you feel about her bitchy attitude, I guess I'd find a way to casually tell her that you don't appreciate her saying things that don't involve her.

Honestly, I don't know if I would even bother. If I didn't want to have anymore contact with her because she's so unbearable, I'd probably just avoid contact with her. Maybe then she'd get the idea. You can't be talkin' smack about people and think they'll still want to hang with you.

Some people are just really negative people. Then again, sometimes there are lots of things going on behind the scenes that we don't know about...even so, it's no excuse to be an a-hole to others.

Yikes. Sorry, Annie and Pedro! I feel your pain!

Upward Falling Autumn said...

Holy crud!! You're way better than me. I think I may have gone off much sooner. I'm actually pissed just reading that, so I may have to cool off before I can give a suggestion!

Pgoodness said...

what a beyotch!!! yes, tell her to f off - he's cheating because he's going to the gym or because she's a jealous loser?! Whatever. I am annoyed for you!! lol

Pedro said...

Ha! I never knew about that one, she implied that I was cheating because I leave the house after 8pm? Wow, that's amazing...I can't believe someone would be so stupid as to imply something like that without knowing anything about our personal lives?

Man...I didn't think I could like her any less.

LJR said...

she needs to go F_CK herself....she is for sure super jealous and lives off talking trash about others....i would of lost my cool with her long ago.

Pedro said...

I'm still in awe that she would pass judgement like that, especially considering that she really knows nothing about me.

That Chick Over There said...

Tell her to go fornicate herself with a sharp stick.

Anonymous said...

OMG. What a horrible person! Sounds like the other mother I knew when I was desperately trying to breastfeed and she had---no kidding---a deep freeze filled to the brim and lorded it over me like she was a personal dairy.
Anyhow, please for your own sanity, say something. Even if it's being nicer than we all want you to be. Try something like, "I appreciate what you're trying to say, but I'm sure you don't mean it to be as cutting as it's coming across." Then, if you're feeling really good, walk away. If not, then toss "Bitch" over your shoulder as you saunter back to your awesome family.
People like that are sooo narrow minded. Keep your chin up, hunny!

Unknown said...

Oh no she didn't! To imply that your husband is cheating would be the last straw had it been me. Tell the nasty skank to keep her rude, unsolicited comments to herself!!!