Monday, November 06, 2006

Phone sex whether or not he wanted it!

This morning I made phone calls that I've been putting off for weeks. First calling the insurance company. Call me crazy but I was unaware that I had to be the one to call them to let them know we had a new family member. During that call Mason comes into the kitchen where I was with his trusty cement truck, only this time apparently the cement truck was his skateboard. Not so much! The first time he stood on it, smack! onto the tile floor he fell. He proceeded to cry the rest of the conversation and I am sure the lady couldn't wait to get off the phone with me and my screaming child.

Next I had to call the cable company. We are all about family in this house, switching from the crappy Showtime channels the Noggin channels. This time I was going to be prepared. I got out a dog coloring book and crayons and sat Mason at the kitchen table. I finally got through to a person when Mason wanted me to color. Okay, fine, sure! Anything to make the call less stressful. While the guy was looking up my account I picked up the red crayon.
"I'll color the dogs tongue. What color is Otto's (our dog)tongue?"
I started to color the dogs tongue. Just as the guy comes back on the line. Mason blurts out.
"What color is Otto's wiener?"
I try to ignore him. Stupid, stupid me. I should know by now that 2-3 year olds don't respond well to being ignored. Instead they get louder and louder.
"Maaamaaaa, What color is Otto's wiener?"
I considered explaining the situation to the cable guy, but then thought, Naaa. Give the man something to do today. He can brainstorm about "what color Otto's wiener is."

4 comments:

Ms. Mamma said...

Hilarious! Thank you for that. I was just ready to get totally shitfaced after Kindermusik tonight and then I read your blog. BwaaaaaaHHHHH!

BlueGoddess said...

I swear most of the time I read your blog I laugh out loud. You are just too funny. Of course I know it doesn't always feel that way at the time your kid is saying something that sounds strange to others. Like when you are in the grocery store.

I have been lucky. My son hasn't said much of that kind of stuff out in public yet. I am just waiting for a whopper.

Silly Hily said...

Oh that's great. Why is it that every single time you get on the phone with someone your kids have to go all crazy on your ass? It's like they know. Silly Girl did the same thing the other day.
I wonder how hard it was for the guy on the other end not to laugh.

So, are you still "packin' up and movin' out?" What's going on with that?

Crunchy Domestic Goddess said...

omg, i am ROFLMAO!!! if i laugh much harder than this i'm going to put myself into labor. :oP