You thought dust bunnies sucked. . .

Well what do you know, Tuesday night my Pedro and I got a little ambitious and decided to redo our dining room. Yes, the same dining room we redid when we moved in 14 monthes ago! I don't mean a little picture moving, I mean major paint stripper high remodeling! We went to Home Depot after dinner and bought a can of paint stripper. WE came home ripped up the carpet, but the boy to bed, and began our wild huffin' high night! We stripped the whole wood floor down to bare wood! I woke up Wednesday with the worst hang-over ever from those fumes! Wednesday night, sanded the whole floor and now we have begun putting poly on it. We are keeping it natural. So now today I picked out the new paint color for the walls and we are working on the trim tonight. Have you ever been in a house that has undergone any sanding projects? IT SUCKS! I have dusted 4 times and I forsee about a dozen more before it is gone. That shit is everywhere!! I'll have to post pictures when it is done. Oh and my other project for the week is to learn how to put pictures up by Sunday! We'll have to see how that turns out. More updates later!

Monday Bloody Monday!

Monday is off with a bang!! In the two hours since the boy woke up, he has managed to:

1. unplug and spill the oil from a wall scented plug in. The smell is making me want to puke even after bath.

2.play "matchbox cars" on the carpet with the potatoes I made him for breakfast.

3. suck Lysol out of the rag in the bucket used to clean up from 1. and 2. (hopefully calling poison control isn't the next thing added to my Monday agenda)

Oh yeah the dog barfed the contents of three meals too! It's OK though, Lysol bucket was already prepared from above activities! Ahhhhh the joys of being a stay-at-home-mom!

Schenkenberg VS. Cheesecake

Marcus Schenkenberg is hot I mean smokin' hot. Tease if you will, but I would rather eat broccoli from in between that man's teeth than dodging horse dung piles with that hillbilly Kenny Cheesecake! I mean Kenny did marry sour-splooge-face Zellwinger.
Heehaw I'm out!

(couldn't resist the 12 year old in me was dying to come out!)

The Blogging Cluster F*ck

Wow, so the more I become addicted to blogging and checking certain blogs daily, I am realizing how much drama is involved! Oh my GOD. I can't get away from it, but I love it. So now I've decided that when I move away to MY island named only with tongue clicks, I am taking a laptop too. For those of you who aren't deep into it, you should be. No cheesy "burning loins" novel could ever compare.

Drama Momma

Do you ever have days that make you want to run away? I don't mean to go buy a new pair of shoes or go to a spa, I mean run FAR away!! We'll it is one of those days. I seem to have these feelings around the same time each month. . .coincidence, hmmmmm? I wish I had the balls and bling to buy my own island in the virgin islands and no one could come or call me without a private invitation from yours truly. I would take my husband and my boy and live happily ever after without the drama of people and problems you cannot get away from. I would wear a coconut bra (made from a huge coconut), and the men on my island would wear a banana leaf. I 'd really become one with nature. I'd start my own island fashion. Crunchie Island Glam! Sign me up.
The old cliche' The Grass is Always Greener , shines so true to me but does it ever stop? When do you really feel like what you are doing and where you are is what is right for you. It seems like a big vicious circle that I want to stop. Can't life just be a triangle instead of a circle?
Well I am of to start cleaning, my MIL is coming for the afternoon tomorrow. . . it never stops.

You don't Know Jack Schitt. . .But you should!!

http://www.barry.fireflyinternet.co.uk/JackSchitt/Jack_Schit.htm

Single Mom Exaustion!

I am pooped! So we have been crazy lately with the holidays and all. We bounced from Pedro's family's cottage to mine and then off to the airport we went to see Pedro off to Cali. Gulp, 5 days just me and the tornado! The bonus of it all was that Pedro took a friendly bump that delayed him a whoppin' 40 minutes and got a free round trip ticket out of it. Sweet!! Now maybe we can take a mini vacation! Dreams sometimes come true right? Until then I am at home slaving away in the hot kitchen! Casserole yesterday, banana bread today, pot brownies tomorrow. Just kidding, those days are long gone. I have the boy now, and by the end of the day if I can lift a glass of wine to my lips without passing out, it's a good day!
I have to say he's been really good so far. I think the trick is to keep busy and not stay kooped inside. Tomorrow we are going up to my families cottage wih my Mom so she can help a bit with the boy. The problem is, he sleeps terrible everywhere but home. It is suppose to be beautiful outside so my plans are to swim him until he's exausted and then swim him a little more until he passes out. So I am out until Saturday and hopefully I'll get back to my faithful blogging. I know I'd be better if some of my girls would comment once in a while so I don't feel like I am writing to a damn computer that can't respond!! Anyway I am going to go rest my butt on the couch and relax a bit!

Pedro~ hurry home, my loins are aching already!! (wink,wink)

Aaaahhhh Saturday!

Today should have been a day of R and R, but it wasn't. I got a whole lot done! It started with a not so early wake-up call from the boy, 7:30 isn't too bad. But I won't mention the hour he spent awake from 12:30 to 1:30am. Damn Teeth! Anyway we went to the farmers market and got some Organic farm fresh eggs (for you to orgasm over CJ) and peas, the boy loves peas in the pod, and garlic. We got home fed the boy lunch, and put him to bed for a nap. I ran errands during nap time. But TONIGHT was very cool. . .we went to Rib Mountain which is only about 5 miles away and saw a band playing folk music at the top of the mountain. IT was called "music in the clouds" and it was beautiful. We felt guilty for not taking advantage of that beautiful place we live so close to! Anyway now we are home and the boy is asleep, it is mommy and daddy quiet time now! We are off early tomorrow morning to go and pick strawberries hopefully it isn't too hot. It has been hotter that FL temps here lately. Thank God for A/C. Peace Out!

Baba Wawa needs to shut the h*ll up!

For those of you non TV junkies, here is a recap. . .
On The View, Barbara Walters got into the discussion of breastfeeding in public, fine.
She said a woman did it in front of her and it made her uncomfortable, still fine, everyone is entitled to their opinions. ( I have no problem whippin' it out in public, but I do almost always use a blanket unless I am with family or close friends.) But once her statement didn't go over well, she went back on the air and said she never said that and it was her flying partner that was uncomfortable! UUUUGGGHHH fortunately I saw both episodes and it really is irritating to me. So I emailed Her. . .
Dear Barbara,
I watch the show daily and have been following the whole breastfeeding controversy. I too am a breastfeeding mother but I am very aware that everyone is entitled to their own opinions. My problem is that I watched the episode where you talked about the breastfeeding mother making YOU feel uncomfortable and also the episode where you called in and said it was the person you were flying with and that it was all a misunderstanding. This is highly irritating to a faithful viewer. If you are going to express your views on sensitive and controversial topics such as this one, you need to be able to back it up and stand by what you said. It is live TV, however many people tape the show daily and are able to replay what was really said. Go ahead, speak your mind, but don't change it once it doesn't go over. You are losing credibility.

Boobie + Edamame = Pass Out

So today was my LaLeche leage meeting and Mason always has a blast. He goes wacko while we are there. We haven't been in a while because I was on strike. The last two times we went, we be faced with a sick kid a couple days later. I just don't understand how people can be so inconsiderate and bring their sick kid knowing that he is going to get other kids just as sick. . .isn't there an unwritten rule about that? You play group mommies would know that. Anyway, so I'll be crossing my fingers until Friday, I figure if there is no snotty nose in 72hrs, we are in the clear.

After my meeting I met another friend out for lunch at a sushi place. Mason LOVES edamame!! Usually they keep him busy for a while, but not today! He was terrible! He spilled my soy sauce, put his fist in my water so that overflowed, then proceeded to spray it all over my friends kids by splashing in it with his hands. . .never a dull moment! At least my friend thought it was hilarious since her kids are older and she's been through it already. They weren't angels either. Her son dumped a water glass too, right into her purse resting under the table. I am sure the resturant staff and patrons couldn't wait for us to leave!! Deal with it!

So I packed Mason up in the car for our half-hour trip home and he fell asleep in 3 minutes. It was a peaceful ride home. Now his is passed out in his crib, and I have a minute to relax. Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!

All About My-Son

Mason was born 6 weeks early- scariest time in my life!! But wow things have changed. Mason is pretty much the naughtiest boy I know. Sometimes I am embarrassed to be around other kids Mason's age because of it. At LaLeche League he scares the other boys by growling in their faces and they run away crying. . .Seriously! He is always the one that moms gasp about and I look to find him standing staight up on a table. He has no fear!
He has become a huge Daddy's boy! Mason and his Dada are so bonded it's unreal. Mason still wakes up during the night for a little milky, and who does he yell for to come and get him, "Da Da! Da Da!" And Mike goes bolting up the stairs for a quick snuggle and to bring him in bed with us for milky. Yes, my 18 month old son is still a nursling. He loves to nurse and I believe that when he no longer needs it, he'll no longer want it. Let's just hope that he doesn't need it still at 5!!
Mason's favorite words are Ahhh-toe: Otto- the dog who takes way too much abuse from the monster.
dah dee: doggie- or anything we happen to see on a leash.
Poo-see: We have NO idea what this means to him?? don't laugh!
Mason's worst time of day is mealtime. He never wants breakfast, he sometimes eats lunch but usually just throws it on the floor , and dinnertime is usually the least painful because his Da da is there to help. He loves anything green! Broccoli, peas, green beans, zucchini. He always eats green first before anything else on his tray. He seems to think the word NO! is hilarious. Hmmm, I must be doing something wrong there!
For what a terror he is and how exausted I am after everyday, he is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. I wouln't change his firey personality for anything!

For you CJ thanks for the idea.

The Draught.

I have been feeling extremely boring lately. Hence the lack of posts. Maybe it is the calm before the writing storm!! OK blah blah. Maybe I should turn it around and ask what my HUGE audience would like to hear about or questions about ME! Fire away!

How my Garden grows. . .

It has been a very busy past week! After completing our marathon road trip to Indiana which was relatively painless, We had a whole nother week to gear up for! Last Wednesday I had a pedicure/spa party with a few girlfriends. It was a nice girls night for me minus baby. "Pedro" took the Tornado out for a boys night of Buffalo wings and chocolate milkshakes, nice huh? I can't complain though. It was a nice 3 hour break.
The weekend was a whirl wind too! On Saturday we planted our second annual garden! We love to be able to eat things that we have grown. We keep it as natural as possible! Last year we didn't use any fertilizers or pesticides, but it wasn't Organic because the seeds weren't organic . This year we are doing the same. I've even found some organic fertilizer made by a big company but just have to figure out were to buy it! This year our big focus is our heirloom tomatoes. (if you watch Barefoot Contessa you know what they are) So enough boring info about my garden. . . I've also been really constipated lately! Ha ha just wanted to make sure to captivate my audience!
It is a beautiful day here today and the boy is down for is nap, I have all my things done for the day so I am going to lay out and take a breath or two!

What chu talkin' bout Willis?

Your Linguistic Profile:

85% General American English

10% Upper Midwestern

5% Midwestern

0% Dixie

0% Yankee

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

All you CJ!

Because I have too. . .

Another meme thingy...
Here we go:
1. If you could kill any celebrity by beating them with a book you own, which celebrity and book would it be?
Dr. Phil with any Dr. Sears book. . .lighten up hard ass!

2. When you have sex, is there a certain TV show you like to sync the sex up with so that as you finish, the show begins?
Nope, it's nap time after nooky!

3. Is there a blog out there that you absolutely hate but are kind of afraid to say something on your own blog for fear that they’ll read it and come to kill you?
I only know a few blogging dorks and anything is fair game!

4. Finish this sentence: If one more person asks me to pass on a meme, I’m going to…
Bore all those who read my blog. . .not that it's been exciting lately!

5. Total volume of music files on my computer?
I don't get it? We have Itunes is that a music file?

6. The last CD I bought was?
I don't even remember it's been so long, but I want to get Matisyahu the reggae hasidic jew! Seriously!!

7. Song playing right now:
music to my ears. . .SILENCE

8. Which people are you passing this baton to, and why?
Again I know very few bloggers so Stacey it's all you! The wedding is over, no excuses now!

hmmm...Nasty Thong??

Your Porn Star Name is: Nasty Thong

Get your own Porn Star Name
http://www.blogthings.com/pornstarletname.html

On the Road Again. . .

As of tomorrow at approximately 6:30 am, we are heading on the longest road trip ever since Mason was born. We are headed to Indy( that's what the locals call it, right Stace?) We are sweating the mongo drive with a 17 month old high maintainance boy. So how did we plan for it you ask? We did the smart thing. . .we went out and bought a car DVD player! That's right, tomorrow I am encouraging my son to indulge in as many Wiggle's DVDs as we can fit in the car.

The rest of my day will be spent preparing of the weekend, bridesmaid dress and all the fixin's to make the weekend as smooth as possible. By the end of the weekend I'll be able to let everyone know which is worse, a screaming kid in the car for 8 hours or listening the the Wiggle's sing about tossing fruit salad for the 98th time. I'm out, wish me luck!

The Final Rose

So there is no disputing that Charlie was about the dopiest bachelor they could find. He looked twice his age. Weathered is hot, but that guy was aged! Let's hear it for Sara! That girl impressed me! One of the few girls to not give up her "flower" to get a rose. Hopefully she can take some of the cheese out of that O'Donnell boy/grandpa and teach him how to kiss!

On a snotty note, the tornado woke up on Sunday with a runny nose! So frustrating! I've been keeping him in a bubble lately to keep him healthy for a wedding we have this weekend in Indianapolis, and bam snotty nose a week before! So yesterday I spent the day making homemade chicken noodle soup and following him around with a wad of Puffs Plus! Any suggestions on how to stifle the snot in a hurry?

The Granola in me!

I wanted to share one of my favorite things to make lately. . .Hummus! Go ahead laugh, I do shave my armpits though! Anyway it is super easy , healthy and tastes Awesome.

Glam Granola's Super Easy Hummus
1 can drained garbonzo beans/ chick peas
1 clove garlic
1 scallion (or more, I just am not an onion fan)
juice from a half of lemon
2 Tbs. olive oil
big pinch sea or kosher salt

Throw it all into food processer until it is mush. Done! Pedro and I eat it with pita chips or carrot sticks. It tastes even better the next day. Try it you'll like it!

Slaaaacker!!!

Oh I know, I am slacking already! Give be a break I had the busiest day I can remember and it started with "the tornado" up and doing damage at 5 am ! uuugghh! 7 am great, 6 am can deal with, but 5 is painfully early. We both got ready for the day and had to leave by 830 to make it to my much needed haircut. I missed Starting Over so any realty queens fill free to fill me in. I still have yet to find another person who watches it. . . I know it is a really sappy reality show with a whole lot of bitchy women backstabbing, crying and visiting the Starting Over shrink Dr. Stan. AKA the Micheal Jackson trial shrink, seriously!
I digress. So I got home around 11 and immediatly put the boy away for nap time. No breaks here though. I worked today!! My friend Trayce owns a maternity boutique and brings for boy to work with her daily and asked me to fill in . It felt awesome! I was there for two quiet hours by myself and then my husband (aka Pedro) brought the boy in to "work" with me until 5. He was better at the store than he is at home. . .is it a sign? I think it's a sign he likes new toys!!
So now I am pooped and ready for bed. Let's cross our fingers for a late morning. Oh my god I am delirious now! I 'm out- I'll have more energy tomorrow.